fIC:
Character name: Paolo_Lorenzo
Date of birth: 1869
Phone number: 599678
Address/general location (optional): My little cardbored box outside Yoshimart
OOC:
Names of any alts you have/had on SZR: Lewis_Katsumoto, 4 Dragon Brotherhood
Previous roleplay experience, including other servers (optional): i have played on the server for around 3 months so i have quite abit of experience
Will your news character be your primary character? (optional): I will play equaly on each character, i play around 10 hours so 5 hours on each
IC:
A brief description of what brought you here. (Was it a recommendation? A wanted ad? Simple whimsy? Something else?): I normally find our alot of interesting stuff around Los Sontos which i would love to share with everybody, and my friend recommended that i should apply to be a news reporter, so i thought il go for it
A brief description of why you feel you'd be an asset to our team (feel free to include relevant skills and/or achievements): I like to always dig deep to get the story and go to any lengths to get the gossip, and i will try my best to do my job
An example of your writing in the two formats ((Article format, no less than 50 words, and in-game /news format, no less than 7 lines. See below for examples. Update: Wackiness (being outrageous) won't get you hired, and please try not to report on the common subjects - Nurgle, UFOs, combat situations, action stories, etc. Made up interviews will NOT be accepted.)):
As night grows over Los Santos, an unknown underground group rises in good looking cars are looking to grief the late night drivers of Los Santos. I was driving around in my car when i saw a driver apposite me getting hit from both sides of his car, i parked my car to see what was going on and these "people" had destroyed this mans car, Was it for revenge or just targeted and will these guys strike again. Slowley i saw more people getting hit by these guys and they were after there cars, they started stealing cars from drivers stoped at red lights and had taken the cars outside the city of Los Santos
/news Hello Los Santos, This is Paolo bringing you your late night news
/news BEWARE night drivers of Los Santos
/news An unknown group of people are after you and your cars
/news We do not no where they came from but they seem to want alot of cars
/news So be careful and look in every direction when you drive
/news This has been Paolo from the SAnews team
/news Stay safe Los Santos
Any additional comments (optional): Hopefully i do good :)
Paolo_Lorenzo, News Application
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Newbie Forum is a moderated OOC forum.
Inflammatory bullshit, thread de-railing, or any other disruptive posts may result in punitive action.
Newbie Forum is a moderated OOC forum.
Inflammatory bullshit, thread de-railing, or any other disruptive posts may result in punitive action.
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- super kawaii ^_^!!!!!!!!
- Posts: 908.0
- Joined: April 9th, 2009, 6:14 pm
- Game Name(s): FAGLORDE_MCMANGA
Paolo_Lorenzo, News Application
[04:50] [chat] [Caitlin_Lee]: but reaches into his pants and with a hand, squeezes his heavy large ballsack
Re: Paolo_Lorenzo, News Application
Mistakes are underlined [spelling]Yamoto wrote:
As night grows over Los Santos, an unknown underground group rises in good looking cars are looking to grief the late night drivers of Los Santos. I was driving around in my, when I saw a driver opposite of me, getting hit from both sides. I parked my car to see what was going on and these people had destroyed this man's car. Was it for revenge or just [randomly] targeted and will these guys strike again? As time went onI saw more people getting hit by these guys and they were after their cars, they started stealing cars from drivers, stopped at red [traffic] lights and had taken the cars past the city boundaries.
/news Hello Los Santos, This is Paolo bringing you your late night news.
/news BEWARE night drivers of Los Santos,
/news An unknown group of people are after you and your cars.
/news We do not know where they came from but they seem to want alot of cars
/news So be careful and look in every direction when you drive
/news This has been Paolo from the SAnews team
/news Stay safe Los Santos
Mistakes are bold [sense,structure of sentence]
•
- What else are they? Aliens?"people"
• How often did you use the word cars? You could try to fit in some synonyms! It's about variation, to make it sound interesting.
I am sorry, but at this stage your English does not reflect our news standard [as shown in the corrections], feel free to give it another go! However I would put in a little more context into your news reports [e.g. "Unknown people want to steal your cars; Man's car got rammed; Will they strike again?; Cars being stolen"]
I'm sure you have what it takes to be in SANews, next time just read through your application again. If you want you can post another two news articles as a reply and we will see what they look like!
Good Luck!
[Sorry to sound so negative, we just want to get the best out of you!]
Kitty_Mason wrote:Rho wrote:im hung like a chinese mouse and will never get to see boobs like those let alone play with them
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- super kawaii ^_^!!!!!!!!
- Posts: 908.0
- Joined: April 9th, 2009, 6:14 pm
- Game Name(s): FAGLORDE_MCMANGA
Re: Paolo_Lorenzo, News Application
Ok thank you for letting me know
il work on it right away
il work on it right away
[04:50] [chat] [Caitlin_Lee]: but reaches into his pants and with a hand, squeezes his heavy large ballsack